34 Lessons in 34 Years: What I’ve Picked Up Along the Way
When I was 18, I knew it all. We all did, right?
Then when I turned 24, I thought I knew it all then, too. And now that I’m approaching my mid-30s — with a bit of reluctance, but also with excitement, as I reach the proverbial “top of the hill” — I’ve realized that we will NEVER really know it all. But with age brings experience. And through these experiences, we gain wisdom and become more resilient.
Because I turn 34 tomorrow, I wanted to challenge myself to explore some big ideas, some principles that guide my life now. Things that I may have not realized back when I was 18 or 24… lessons that I’ll bring with me on my journey through the next 10, 20, 30 years. A list that will continue to evolve, change and become longer, naturally.
So as I continue the expedition to the top of the hill, here are some lessons that I’ll take with me.
1. Hard work is always worth it.
No matter what we’re after in life, the hard work that we put into things will always give us back more than what we put into it — especially if we give it our best effort.
2. Friends come and go.
Life has its seasons, and the people who are in our lives also are seasonal. It’s OK to let go of relationships that no longer serve us and embrace and enter in to those that do.
3. Your happiness is completely up to you.
We are in complete control of our experiences and the happiness we create in this life. If you don’t like something, change it.
4. Fear is the reason we don’t start or do.
Don’t let fear hold you back from awesome experiences. Everything in life that’s really changed me was scary at some point. Follow your fear, and leave your comfort zone.
5. An abundance of material things won’t improve your life.
Who I am is not defined by what I have. Material things, designer fashion and the latest tech come and go, and there’s far better things to invest your money in.
6. Learning is a lifelong process.
Embrace growth and accept that there’s always more to learn. Be curious, and spend time expanding your thinking and understanding.
7. Begin now to move closer to your dream.
Stop thinking, analyzing and making excuses. Today is the day to start, to make changes and progress. You’ll never regret starting sooner than later.
8. Lift up others.
If you want to compliment someone, do so. If you admire someone, tell them. Acknowledging the good you see in others is to also acknowledge the good you see in yourself.
9. It’s essential to indulge in creativity.
We were all born to create. So dance, write, make music, design, paint and make. Exploring this part of yourself is how you discover the mark you’ll leave on this world.
10. We all don’t know what we’re doing.
Everyday, we wing it. We fake it until we make it. We don’t have all the answers. Acknowledge this in everyone — including yourself. Be gracious, and just do the best you can.
11. We learn the greatest from our failures — big and small.
Failure is one of of the best ways to grow and evolve.
12. Your health is everything.
Self-care is a way to show love and invest in yourself. Eat nourishing food, know what gives you energy, and put your health above all else.
13. Marry your best friend and someone you respect.
You spend all of your time with your spouse — they’re your sounding board, therapist, career advisor and biggest source of truth.
14. Always put your partner before yourself.
If you put them first, they’ll also do the same for you. And this reciprocity is the secret to a great marriage.
15. Pour yourself into your children, but do not give up on your dreams.
Children are one of life’s biggest blessings, but do not lose yourself in spite of raising them.
16. Do not tolerate negativity and hurtful behaviors from others.
You do not have room or energy in your life to deal and put up with those who do not lift you up.
17. Your passion will lead you to your purpose.
Find what you’re passionate about, do it, and it will change your life in unexpected ways. Having and finding purpose is the key to a fulfilling life.
18. Travel as much as you can.
Invest in experiences with people you love. Experiencing all that this world has to offer will allow you to learn and grow in unimaginable ways.
19. Make room for things that matter.
There’s always enough time, money and energy for things that matter the most.
20. Moderation is the key to a healthy balance.
Going overboard on any one thing leads to imbalance and will ultimately hurt you over the long run.
21. Practice empathy, not sympathy.
To truly understand others, try to see life from their perspective versus feeling sorry for them. Being empathetic allows us to acknowledge that we’re all on our own journey and have a unique story.
22. Don’t compare your journey to others.
You can’t compare yourself to others and be happy at the same time. Comparison will only rob you of happiness, joy and fulfillment.
23. Find faith and practice it every day.
The effect of faith and trusting in a higher being allows you to let go of burdens and find more meaning in everything you do and experience.
24. Not everyone has to like you.
Don’t care what other people think — regardless of who they are. What others say about you has everything to do with them, and nothing to do with you.
25. You are the captain of your own vessel.
The only thing that stands in your way to achieving what you want to achieve and living the life you want is you.
26. Record memories and moments.
Take pictures and videos; don’t run from the camera. Our memory will live on in the way we document our lives and will become part of our legacy.
27. Do the things that make you feel beautiful.
Whatever it is, take the time and energy to make yourself feel beautiful. It goes a long way in instilling confidence in both yourself and others.
28. You always know what’s best for yourself.
Do not second-guess your intention, and do not let anyone else determine what’s good for you.
29. You are where you’re meant to be.
Never think that you should have accomplished more, or be more, based on what society has defined.
30. Life is short — make your one shot at it really count.
We only get one opportunity to live on this beautiful earth. Don’t squander the chance to be great and do significant things.
31. Embrace your age.
Maturity is a good thing, and the way we see and react to the world changes for the better as we get older.
32. Confidence comes through action.
No matter what it is, the more we do, the better we become. Practice doesn’t make perfect, but brings conviction and belief.
33. Nature is healing.
Walk in the dirt, breathe in the fresh air, listen to the birds, let the sun shine on your face, and visit the water. Mother Nature is one of the best ways to heal ourselves.
34. Every day is a brand-new beginning.
Embrace that, and know you are never stuck.
“The great thing about getting older is that you don’t lose all the other ages you’ve been.”